Woman in the Black Dress

Entry 07 12:59pm



As she stood there in the hallway, my hands began to tremble in light desperation. Hopes, dreams, wishes, and thoughts overfilled my mind like an overflowing cereal bowl. I hate the mess it leaves. 'What if this is it?' were my thoughts exactly. A single moment of sight was all that was needed to lower the walls that built a defense to save me from the destruction that love-failed games tend to extract. I don't have anything left to give after the first aftermath, but something inside me cleverly built up a manufactured ounce of care.

I took the first few steps towards her to muster a 'Hello, how are you?' but the Adams apple stuck in my esophagus turned into a crimson apple to be pierced by an arrow. That's when my throat choked up. Fighting every ounce of struggle with myself became a war I had to win within the next few seconds. I think I broke a world record. She looked up at me and said, "Hey! There you are!" I smiled. Not a word back. What can I even say that won't jeopardize the peace I've fought so hard to attain in the past few months. "Hey..." and that was it.

We left to find a place to nestle ourselves between a wooden table that would separate the two worlds colliding. She wore a black dress that would scream a sound of disaster. I couldn't hear it since I was too busy being lost by the sweet and flattering words that would come out of her mouth. Her masked lips would mimic the feeling of tranquility only to find solace within the sound of her voice. Her manufactured smile, delicately covered by a poison of misconception. But her eyes would shine such a bright light that blinded me from the war that would soon end. Casualty count...1.

Weeks have gone by. The costume of perfection has engulfed the sound of alarms ringing throughout my body like sound proof walls. This poison has transformed my nerve cells into robotic circuitry, programmed to do just one thing...love. A belief so far fetched in my normal understanding, but somehow I've come to the point of re-acquainting myself with this eerie passion. Her touch as fake as a car salesman convinced my feeble mind I was everything this world needed; only to find out I was only a tool. That's when my eyes opened.

I saw her there. She wore a black dress with eyes that tell white lies. I saw a bloody dagger in her left hand and a withered black heart in the right. Her hair as nappy as spider webs...God I hate spider webs. She looked up at me and said "Hello." My stomach turned. I stared at her and decided to turn around and walk away. I know I don't have much; and I know that It may not suffice to the fulfillment of others. But this tiny piece of heart that keeps me going with every ounce of strength and hope is what tells me I have only 1 chance left. When it's time I'll give everything that's left; because it means absolutely everything to me.